Sick Bird

Having a cold, being sick is a lot like taking drugs. Your mind looses a sense of propriety, your body feels funky and weird and you don’t get a whole lot done. At some point with drugs you also feel sluggish and miserable and sick. With colds you take drugs that make you feel all bizarre and weird.

I’ve been in this dull sense of being since Friday when I finally succumbed to being sick. It’s a weird cold. It’s barely on the surface and I feel a combination of okay and weak. I’m trying to drink lots of fluids and failing and I have taken about ten showers in the last two days. I will in fact be hitting that up after this. The good thing is last Sunday I discovered the joys of citrus water where you cut up a bunch of oranges and lemons and pour some water over them in a jug. Shit is delicious and since I have now decided to cut Gatorade out of my diet thanks to the documentary King Corn it will become a regular staple in my diet. Not sure how I will pull it off at my office job, but oh well.

So part of being sick is sleeping a lot and then, for me anyway, waking up really cranky and restless. I counter acted this by surfing Facebook, that fantastic social network site that I have become enamored with and self revealing. My relationship with this network site is becoming a bit reckless I must say. As more of my “friends” find me more and more people get the opportunity to crawl into this psychotic head of mine. One that has decided to be more and more vulnerable. So today I became “friends” with some one I first met in High School whom I love very much. She had tagged in her profile the high school we went to and year of graduation. This is information I have shied away from in my own profile. The thought of people from my past who I am no longer connected to in any way, shape or form finding me through this impersonal technological interface just bothers me. Same goes for work. I don’t want people I don’t know checking me out. Granted I have all the privacy settings in the world created, but still, that blast into the past just unnerves me.

At the same time I have reconnected with people, some people who I find truly amazing and wonderful and though I am terrible at keeping in touch with people it’s nice to have this thinly strung life line. Because the Internet is such an easy tool to connect with people, and as a writer I want to connect with people it’s hard to resist. It’s also hard to navigate between self revealing and crossing lines. There are things I have posted on this Internet world that some people who are my digital friends would find pretty uneasy in “real life”. Because I do have tact, I keep my candid conversations confined to appropriate people in day to day life. But not so much on the Internet. My ideologies about life, the universe and everything are not exactly in step with a majority of the population. I have no religious beliefs and yet very strong opinions on religion. I find government suspect of treason against the living will of people. I probably hate your favorite bands and will ridicule and make fun of just about anything (sometimes without informed intelligence) because this vehicle allows for off the cuff free writing.

By doing all of this, I invade into people’s lives, though it’s an invasion that they choose to participate in. I wonder though, how much of this is crossing lines out there. There are topics I write about, or want to write about that are certainly not appropriate for engaging in with casual acquaintances or co-workers. There are personal aspects of my life that I think some people would find confusing, especially against the version of me that they know. People are multifaceted. We have many aspects of personality that make up the whole. What we chose and the context in which we chose to share those things is becoming largely blurry in our technologically driven world. This isn’t really a new concept, its one that I have talked about quite a bit in the past and I don’t think there is a clear dialog on the subject.

So there you have it, a Sunday ramble from your friends at Franconia Station, Inc. I wanted to write a music post this week, but the shit is just not in the cards. I don’t have the energy. I am listening to Juliana Hatfield though. That shit is quite enjoyable. She has a lot of albums out. I had no idea. Life is a funny, funny thing.


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