It probably comes as little surprise to my faithful readers that I am not feeling this election. The older and older I get, the less and less luster this whole process holds for me. After all, at this point in my life, I have accepted that I have a fringe outlook on the world and that my ideas, while not wholey radical, aggressive, subversive or even that interesting are not in line with those of my general peers. Here goes another cycle where we pit one person with such a vauge political ideology against another to effectively “lead” this country into territories unknown as the global world seems to get more and more bleak. Fantastic!
Some people I know are gonna ask why I even bother. I don’t have a good answer to that to be honest. I am voting, I think my choice is pretty obvious and I don’t think much of it. Frankly I don’t really have much confidence in my choice and I don’t beleive he is a man any greater then any other that applies for this job and then begs the public for lots and lots of money to advertise himself and his pseudo list of qualifications. I am skeptical of anyone who wants to be a leader. So rarely are they qualified, honest and abel to actually lead people.
I also find it hard as an athiest to vote for someone who is so willing to give money to faith based groups. This has been the point of contention I have grappled with the most since I decided to vote. I don’t beleive in a higher patriarchal order. To me submission to the idea is a shunning of personal responsibility, an illogical conclussion and the purchase into a carnival of repression, hatered, violence, bigotry, racism, sexism, torture and murder. I can’t willingly think anyone who believes ghost stories is correct minded.
On the flip side, the appeal of having the first ever non-white male president in my life time is something very tempting. Lets face it, our representation througout our history when seen from an uneducated eye would pretty much make anyone think we are some sort of weird biological breed of white male pod creatures that fuck ourselves for reprodcution. The “otherness” finally being represented, even in it’s meager, scary shell is appealing to me. Would I perfer a queer identified, pink haired human that listens to Crass records and can play “Cocaine Blues” on the guitar? Fuck Yea. But that I know will not happen in my lifetime. It’s hard not to think of this as a step in the right direction, even if it’s for a man who has a vastly different philosophy on life then I do.
Like many others, these times are scaring the shit out of me. The future is so much more uncertain for me personally then it ever has been. The responsibility, and the means to manage that is a juggling act I am not exactly enjoying. I don’t see much in the way of politics that can really save that, but I don’t think our politicians have ever done anything for us. I don’t think that will change too much, no matter what color, race, gender, sexuality or hair color they have. I will not be watching the election news on Tuesday night. I won’t really care too much when it is announced on Wedensday morning what state is still in contention. I will cast my ballot with the drones for the man with the big ears from the crooked town of Chicago in my oh so heavily contested state. I will sleep just as unsoundly that evening. It will all continue to be the same for me.